In a high stress situation you need to take a break, a pause, and reset your emotional distance.

When you pause, you freeze the negotiation and step away psychologically and often physically.

Use the time for a detailed review of where you are, where you want to be, and the obstacles impeding you getting to your goal.

How do you push the “Pause Button”?

  • Flat out ask for some time to think it over. That is pretty hard to refuse.
  • Tell them you need some time to absorb what they have proposed.
  • Ask for a bathroom break.
  • Tell them there is someone with whom you need to consult before proceeding. If you do this give them a time you will get back to them.

When on the “Pause” here is what you need to be doing.

  • Ask yourself if you need any additional information.
  • Make sure you heard everything the other side was saying. Was what they were saying consistent with their high-contextual message (body language, tone of voice anything between the lines).
  • Review what you said and ask yourself if you could have made it clearer.
  • Do you need to re-set the limits of what you are willing to accept. Remember, the best deal you negotiate is the one you care about the least.
  • Make sure you are not about to concede on something you will later regret.
  • Ask yourself if you are ready to finalize the deal. Is it complete?
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